Thrifted a 'vintage' jacket. Found a movie ticket from 2019 in the pocket. This is not vintage. I am not vintage. Time is a lie.
The ticket was for Avengers: Endgame. 2019 was 7 years ago. Wait no, 2019 was last year. Wait. 2019 was 2019. I need to sit down. The jacket is cute though.
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2019 is simultaneously 3 years ago and 47 years ago. This is the only fact I know.
I found a Target receipt from 2016 in a 'vintage' coat. The coat cost $12. The receipt showed I bought cereal and regret. Both still valid.
My 'vintage' store sells things from 2015 now. I wore that to high school. I am not vintage. I am just old. Delete this.